4TH JUNE 2012
Self is an individual person as the
object of his/her own reflective consciousness. Self concept is the
self-perception or view you have of yourself. Perception is the process of
selecting, organizing and interpreting sensory date in a way that enables us to
make sense of our own words. Self concept is everything you think and feel
about yourself. While you are not born with a self concept, you certainly do
develop one. David Barnlund argued that, “individuals conduct themselves
through relationships they have, they wish to have or perceive themselves as
having”. It always involves the relationship between people or their genuine
idea of themselves. In intrapersonal communication, we know that self tries to
understand and share meaning.
Based on David Barnlund’s argument
on the six (6) person communication idea.The first argument which is “how you
view yourself ”can be influenced by how you are now, how you were in the past
and how you perceive yourself to be in the future; which can be termed as the
ideal self. “Part of knowing who we are, is knowing we are not someone else”, as
quoted by Miller Authur.People turn to be products of how others treat them,
and the messages they receive from others. Someone may be perceived to be a
quiet person and another talkative like some presenters. The perceived self
concept of communication helps the individual to understand how he/she sees
him/herself to be. An individual describing him/herself would give so many
details, but lays more emphasis on his/her character. It helps the individual
view him/herself before communicating with another person. During communication
you view yourself, and understand viewing you using the artistic self concept
by being creative. Hence, the artistic, perceive and the ideal self concept
influences communication between two parties.
How you view the other person was
the second communication idea argued by David Barnlund. People always perceive
others in different manners and can be either positive or negative. The
intellectual self concept enables us to inquire to learn more about other
people’s behavior. The way you view people don’t have effect on them. People
try to expose themselves when interacting with others, which is considered as
the social self. In other words, the social self helps you to view the other
individual during communication. Perceiving an individual’s idea is a very
difficult task because some individuals have certain things that they don’t
disclose to others which refers to the person’s private self. We at times
consider one or two things about people and draw final conclusion. An example
is when a gentleman has interest in a beautiful lady and takes notice of her
features and characteristic. He is then encouraged to enter into a relationship
with her. During courtship, the lady’s real self makes the guy to notice her
bad character and decides to quit the relationship. We should therefore not be
inventors of people’s perception because it can influence communication between
them and us can be influenced.
Communication can be influenced on “how
you believe the other person views you”. Some people don’t like to give a wrong
impression and are very cautious of what they do and say during communication
process. “First impression they say counts a lot”, and how the other person
views you is very important. In communication, before an individual develops
trust for the other person, it depends on certain things. This includes the
mood, the tone, choice of words and also the way they respond to each other
during communication. Each of the argument or case of discussion is unknown to
the individual, through the just mentioned evidences; one can draw the
attention of the other. One can use his/her knowledge acquired to make people
trust him/her. People just believe others because of their place of work and
also develop a whole truth for others through the feelings they have for them.
This can affect communication either positively or negatively. I am a
gentleman, smart and hardworking. A lady
in my class admires me so much. One day, the unexpected happened when she
witnessed me in fight with somebody. I have just exhibited my real self which
is very difficult to know. Now I don’t know the lady’s perception of me, and
this has influenced my communication with her.
“ How the other person views
him/herself” cannot be left out as a communication idea of Barnlund’s argument.
In our definition of self from the beginning, we mentioned about intrapersonal
communication where the self tries to understand and share message internally
or within one self. It relates to self talk, which is the mental process of
understanding and sharing meaning within the self. A misunderstanding between a
passenger and a conductor of a bus transpired on my way home from school. The
passenger was counting on the driver to intervene in the dispute, raised his
head and saw the inscription written behind the driver,“Respect my office”. The
statement clearly showed the professional and real self of the driver of the
bus. This influenced communication in the bus and the passenger assesses and
views himself without the driver interfering.
“How the other person views you”,
was another point argued by David Barnlund has a person communication idea.
William Fadie said, “We have time to hear, but not to listen”. In
communication, one must pay attention in order to get the picture in the
message during interaction. A boy who likes to play tricks decided to do so to
an old man. Hiding a bird in his palm behind him, he asked the old the old man
to tell whether the bird is alive or dead. The old man questioned himself and
answered saying, “the life of the bird is in your hands”. The public self of
the old man is disclosed in this public situation whilst the real self of the
boy is also disclosed. Communication becomes influence because the old man
views the other, which is the boy.
The final point argued by David
Barnlund on the communication person idea was “how the other person believes
you view him/her”. A clear example can be, a secretary given some amount of
money by an accountant for the acquisition of accessories and documents. Her
physical self, which includes the concept of her own body and physical attractiveness,
influenced her. She uses the money on cosmetics and the rest on only the
accessories. Later, her emotional self takes over and she realizes her mistake
and felt sorry. The accountant makes no comment on the issue for a week. In a
general meeting, she couldn’t stop wondering how the accountant views her and
communication between them becomes influenced.
The above excerpt, vividly
explains how the six (6) person communication idea argued by Barnlund related
to the eleven person self can influence the various forms of communication.
References:
1. Gamble,
T. and Gamble M (1996) Communication works
2. McCutcheon,
R. and Schaffer, J. (1994) Communication matters.
